I think all of us have our cycles, there will be this one period of time where you just don't wanna deal with people, you just need to go into that box where you just "cut ties with all the lies that you've been living in". I think I'm there again, I somewhat stopped communicating with people much, I kinda rather be left alone at times. It's normal right? At least I think all of us will go through that, correct me if I'm wrong. But the thing is, Alex is my exception, probably cause I've became so comfortable around him, he became my box. It's like I can do what I want, just be me and not having to put up a happy face and act like everything in my life is okay and just really escape life. And I know I've been complaining too much lately, I feel like a fricking brat now sitting here typing this, but that's just me.. Oh btw, I absolutely hate people that shakes their head at me as if I'm some bloody spoiled brat. Anyways, just bear with me for this period okay? I'm saying this to people around me that I actually care about. And to some ridiculous people that won't leave my life alone, really? like really? stop bugging me if you just want to use me to achieve something for your own benefit. Please, I'm really not that stupid, so just leave me alone. Doubt they will see this post but I'm saying it anyways. Btw, I would like to rant about how my clients are really ridiculous, but one manage to push me to the point where I just lost it and yell over the phone. I don't think I've ever done that before since I've started working in this firm. Like really, some common sense la, I'm not your bloody slave, you do your part and I'll do mine, don't make it my fault just because you're incompetent.
And just an additional, I feel as though my family wont accept me for who I am. Probably this is really naive, like really naive, but I want Alex to be part of my family, to live our life together. I've been thinking about telling my family about it, but there's no where to start. And I still can't find the courage to do that. I used to think that things will definitely work out, but due to recent events, I've changed my opinion on things.
Cheers ya'll.
